Thread:ChromastoneandTabby/@comment-4952704-20151204115730

Yo. I figured i may as well make this now, i'm announcing a series on the 7th, as my last series on BTFF. And i would just like your input, as well as your artwork, for the series. Also, please don't TL;DR me.

Now before you ask what it's about, i'll try to do my best to explain it to you in a way that'll sound appealing:

Sif Hunderson, better known as Penance, is an antihero looking to redeem himself for past sins in a city he once destroyed.

That's a short synopsis, and while it may sound edgy, the series itself is partly a comedy. Believe it or not, the series isn't so much about the villains, and the story is so basic that any noob can think of it. He we wants to protect the city, help rebuild it.

What are his past sins, you ask? The series is placed in an already established universe. I'm not talking about like an actual series being made or is made, i mean in the context of the series. Prior to the events of Penance, Sif was part of a team.

The team, you ask? Team 10. I wrote bios for every single Team 10 member, which i'll happily send, but basically, Team 10 has a variety of members from aliens, to an omnitrix bearer, to sorcerers, to ghosts, to Alchemists, to Kamen Rider-based people, to angelic beings, etc, etc. In fact, here's the bios:


 * E-10 - Ethan Welker, the leader of Team 10. He gained a device known as the Omnitrix when he was young, and has since used it for saving the world countless times. Though as he grew older, he was considered to be more ruthless and straight-forward, who really can't take a joke.


 * Doctor Mig - Miguel Rivers, the once best friend of Sif Hunderson. He was the son of a brilliant surgeon, but was soon lost to Mig's lost step brother, Gimmore. Mig had soon learned of his heritage, being from an alternate dimension named Aqasia. Mig's father as he knew him wasn't his biological father, but the ruler of Aqasia is. Born as Mig Serriv, he was soon hid after birth to lead a life away from Aqasia, as he was adopted by Alphonse Rivers, and had his name changed to Miguel Rivers. After finding out about his heritage, he soon learned about the dangers of this world, and had intense training to be known as a sorcerer named Doctor Mig.


 * Rider - Also known as Christopher Chase, or Chris, is E-10's right hand man. Chris was childhood friends with Ethan, as he was the only one who knew about E-10's secret. After an encounter with a man named Rider, he was soon put under his belt as an apprentice, inheriting a suit with ancient power. With Chris going as the second Rider, he gained the power of strength, endurance, speed, and cosmic energies. Although, he was at odds with Sif numerous times.


 * Rajiv Tech - Rajiv Jackel, an older member of Team 10. Being experimented on as a child, Rajiv gained the abilities of technological control. Being the other best friend of Ethan, Rajiv was usually described to be the tech support of the group before Sif. Although, unlike most other members, he also puts focus on his personal life as a musician/vocalist, making him famous. Because of the high respect, Sif usually resented Rajiv, but the feeling was mutual as Rajiv also resented Sif.


 * Omniversal - Wil McCage, is the new addition and replacement of Sif for Team 10. Coming from a poor family, Wil made a living on his own building and fixing mechanics. His main ability is his Omniversal Mark VII suit, which could mimic and adapt to any situation. Not only is it mechanical, but it's also described to be mystical, as it's sentient and prone to evolve from time to time. He is constantly at odds with Brian, however.


 * Alienated - A-Ren, also known as Brian Jackel, is an alien from the Andromeda Galaxy. He was found crash landed on Earth by Rajiv, and soon to be his best friend. A-Ren was given an identity as Rajiv's cousin, Brian Jackel. Brian is known to have the power of controlling elements, such as water, earth, lightning, fire, air, etc. He is known to be at odds with Mike and Wil, as he's considered brash and stubborn.


 * Pride - Alan Nomaly, is an older member of Team 10. Originally known as Alanomaly, he had the power of Alchemy. He had spent much time studying the powers of alchemy, and eventually tried to learn how to make artificial life. He learned of the dangers that came with it, but went along with it anyways, creating a new human life. However, this life was dangerous. It had no body, so it tried to take over Alan's. This life was full of itself, always putting itself above the rest, so when Alan finally regained control of his own body, he named the new personality Pride, and eventually, the two grew to be allies.


 * Klandestine - Tayla Class, like Rajiv, was experimented on as a child. Though unlike Rajiv, remained under testing throughout her teenage years as Project: Klandestine. Being killed and resurrected, she inherited ghost-like powers such as flight, intangibility, and ectoplasm-type powers, as well as communication with the dead and precognition. She does seem to care for Mig and Sif, as well as Mike, though completely hating Ethan, Brian, Rajiv, and Chris. Although, she isn't very prominent in the team, she is still considered part of Team 10.


 * Cloud - Like Mig, Cloud is not from this dimension. Instead, he was raised in Purgatory. Cloud had spent centuries upon centuries learning from the ways of an old angel and training himself as he looked down on the world with complete disgust. But, he was inspired by E-10's actions to also become part of his team. Being an early member as well, he eventually found a way to exit Purgatory and came to Earth as Cloud the Dark Hunter. Being considerably knowledgable, he served as the mentor for the majority of the team members, and was even a temporary leader. Though he has no real enemies, he does show some dislike for Rajiv and Brian.


 * Mike - Mike Russo, who literally goes by Mike, is a multi millionare teenager who joined Team 10 when he was young. Unlike all of the members presented, he doesn't fight. He has funded the base of operations and everything Team 10 has ever needed. He serves as the sort of director, who stays at the base and communicates with the team, as well as informing them of threats. He is considered friendly with everyone but Brian, as they both share a mutual hatred.

In the lore of this universe, Team 10 has existed for about 5 years or so. Each with unique people with abilities. (Over the course of the series, we do eventually get a look at each one of them uniquely, though not in Season 1).

What does Sif have to do with this? He was once a member of Team 10, known as Shift. He doesn't have superpowers, but he does have two unique traits: The fucker invents. He spent most of his kid years and teenage years studying alien technology, as he's a brilliant inventor. That, and he does have a lot of fighting skill.

During his time with Team 10, he was constantly pushed to the side. Rajiv Tech, E-10, Doctor Mig, Alienated, Cloud, Klandestine, those people were respected. Both inside the team itself and the public. Some were just sidelined, and Shift happened to be one of them. He didn't get enough attention, no one wanted him, no one paid attention to him.

Like if he stops the bad guy, no one bats an eye. One of the others do it and everybody loses their minds. Even within the actual team and their headquarters, no one really respected Shift, except for a few, which happened to be his highly respected girlfriend (within Team 10), Anna.

This drove Shift to be really greedy and shit, as he constantly badmouthed other members both in the public and within headquarters. He endangered other lives just to stop the bad guy the fastest, or in style. He grew impatient, and pushed even his friends away just so he could gain respect and recognition.

The two big culminating moves started with Revilo City. A highly religious man of the god Revilo threatened to destroy the city as he believed it was against Revilo's design. Team 10 wanted to strategize, and since this was worldwide news, Shift saw this opportunity to gain true recognition.

Instead of helping others evacuate, or scanning the area, or any of the logical steps, Shift went into the bombers' lair, and found the huge bomb right there. He grabbed an explosive, and shot it down without even thinking. He grabbed the man with the detonator, and pushed him outside to beat him down.

Although, there was one thing he didn't count on: A second bomb. The man detonated it, causing a huge chunk of the city to be demolished, killing thousands. I could have worded this better. Shit.

Anyway, you get the point. City is destroyed, it's Shift's fault, and he was blamed. As they went to headquarters, they all ganged up on Sif, yelling at him for what he did. How greedy he was, just to get some recognition. Sif, instead of talking it out like a normal person, decided fight everyone who ganged up on him, as Anna tried to stop him.

The final culminating move was that he shot Anna (accidentally) with one of his weapons, ultimately putting her in a coma.

Giving up all contact with Team 10, and his name as Shift, he soon knew that he had to redeem himself as a vigilante/anti-hero named Penance.

Now that we got the backstory out of the way, lets get into this.

Right off the gate, i will tell you right now. The audience is NOT supposed to relate to Penance. The thing about him is, no matter how you slice it, he's a cold blooded MURDERER. Even if the audience thinks he's cool, or he's funny, or he's badass, they aren't supposed to relate to this guy.

He's intentionally crazy. Like, medically. He does kill his villains, he doesn't take prisoners. Maybe on a few occasions but when he deals with a thug or a villain, he deals with them. The dude has a problem. In fact, he's so insane, that he legit installed an A.I. akin to JARVIS called M.A.X.I.M.U.S., and to make things even crazier, he put sarcasm on the A.I.

The dude doesn't care, he legit put sarcasm into the A.I. that's supposed to help him and stuff. He's part of the comedy of this series. Despite him being crazy, or full of negative emotions or actions, the one thing he states is that he's not an 'edgelord'.

There is a scene that displays this, where he walks up to a thug and he asks if he'll kill him. Penance is just like "Oh no, you're not getting off that easy", and starts a monologue about how there's nowhere he can hide, that if he even so much as breathe on someone, he will be there. He will know. At his most desperate hours, Penance will be there watching. Even in his dreams, he'll be there.

And he goes on like that, and after a few seconds of awkward silence... he starts bursting into laughter, saying that he's too lazy for that shit. He's not at all that edgy, he says. And continues on to say something like "Come on, do i look like Batman to you?".

Penance is a simple character. He's not at all that serious, but his overall objective is very serious and very simple. He wants to help Revilo City, as he resides there and it's where the series takes place. He'll throw references and quips, he'll act like a total badass, he'll make awesome inventions, but he's a murderer and he's actually crazy. He'll kill you straight up. No BS.

Now, you may be asking. Who's the real down to earth character? Who's the meat of the story? That would be Sif's really good friend, Melinda Jordonna, or Melody as her nickname.

Believe it or not, Melody is NOT a love interest at any point, she's just a great friend. The audience sees it through her eyes, almost like she's the protagonist. She's ultimately the character who supports Penance, but adds the balance from the crazy side of the series.

Another character is a man named Thomas Picardo, who came from another world and was shunned. His family were killed because of their religious beliefs, and retreated to the main timestream that is Penance. He does build up the overall villain of Season 1, and he does have his own twist, i'd happily go into detail after you respond.

I'd like to end off with one more scene, and i think it should help with the tone. Episode 1 has a scene with Melody and Sif in a cafe, discussing which side their own (Team Iron Man or Team Captain America). Legit. And they legit do bring up points.

Again, i'll happily go into more detail after you respond. I'd like to hear your thoughts, and whether you'd like to join in as a consultant or not. Key word: Consultant. If yes, i'd like to hear your take. This is Draft #1, after all.

Now, here comes the requesting part: Penance's design. His design is hella complicated, so i'll start with the face:

His hair is black, but it's not too short and it's not too long. I wouldn't know how to describe it, bit dont make it ugly. As for anything else, he's a white guy, and he wears pitch black glasses to sort of hide his identity. The glasses do have some sort of holographic features that is sorta visible through the glasses.

As for his body,

Example 1

Example 2

The body is that exact suit, no different. (reminder, body, not HEAD. He doesn't wear a mask, it's what's described.). Replace the orange with the color of #4BFD8A. I'm not much of a coder, so you might wanna try that out in any way you can. It's sort of green-ish but teal as well.

Replace the orange with that color. Final request? This is the tricky part, some of his weapons i have pictures of, and could you please add them in. Remember, take your time with the design, don't rush it, and don't feel the need to put a deadline.

The first gun is on his side/holster, where a gun should be. It's the Ray Gun. Here's another image, Example 2.

The second weapon is on his sache (idk what to call it, its the thing that goes down his torso like a utility belt) are two tomahawks. One is lava-y and the other one is electric based. Pic 1, Pic 2. As well as this on his sache thing, he has ammo that looks like these green things.

The third weapon is on the other holster, is an ice-based gun.

The fourth weapon is on his back, facing the right. It's a sniper like weapon, with It looking like Example 1, and Example 2.

The fourth weapon is facing the opposite side of his back, and it looks like this. Another example, is this.

He also has two batons on his back, sticking upwards and are closer to his neck.

As for his shoulders, instead of those shotgun shells, the right side of his shoulder has ammo for the ray gun that looks like this, another example is this.

His left side however has stuff that looks like those purple things.

This will be difficult, but you don't have to go super in-depth. Just get the basic concepts of the guns. No deadline, take your time.

That's my request for the Penance design. 